Where do your kids spend most of the time when they’re at home? In a communal space or up in their bedroom? It’s probably not something many of us parents think about. We just want to get through the day and don’t care where our kids hang out at home, as long as they’re safe. But a TikTok video that’s amassed more than 27 million views as of presstime is bringing attention to the idea of where our kids stand, literally and figuratively, and how it shapes family dynamics.

TikTok user @alexxx1915 captioned the now-viral video, "I just learned the term 'living room family' and I never understood why my kids never played in their rooms when I always did as a kid." The short clip shows toys scattered across the floor and a TV on in the background as her two little ones (and the family dog) play.

But what exactly is a “living room family?” It refers to all family members, kids included, who hang out in a communal space, as opposed to a “bedroom family,” where kids retreat to their rooms instead. 

This idea goes beyond physical space, however. Experts say “living room children” feel comfortable making their presence known in the home’s common areas. These kids know their parents are accepting of them having toys and playthings scattered around the home, and that there aren’t designated kid spaces and adult spaces. “Bedroom children,” on the other hand, may feel uncomfortable and like they need to stay out of sight, thus keeping to their own personal space.

I always find it to be an annoying inconvenience that my family home doesn’t have a separate playroom. My son’s play area takes up at least a third of our family room, the room in which we spend the most time, and truthfully, his stuff is kind of an eye sore too. But after learning about this concept of a “living room family,” I truthfully don’t care as much. I’m happy to have his most prized possessions in our main room in the home, because it means he’ll hang out with me and my husband more. 

I know this will change as he gets older; to be honest, I remember spending all my time as a teenager up in my room watching TV and instant messaging my friends on AIM after finishing up homework and dinner. But for now, I’m going to lean into having my kiddo’s stuff all over the place. It’s an indication that we have kids that live with us, and that we value their stuff and our time together.

Many commenters on the TikTok videos agree, and see being a “living room family” as a compliment; it means we create a safe space for our children and allow them to be seen and heard. Modern parenting can be polarizing, sure, but togetherness and a sense of belonging is a powerful message I think all parents can get behind.

Are you also a “living room family?”

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