Becoming a parent is undeniably transformative for everyone, but neurodivergent parents have an especially unique experience when it comes to raising children. Our neurodiverse traits can influence how we connect with people, manage daily life, and handle stressful situations—all important aspects of parenting

Neurodivergent people interact with the world in ways that may not be considered “typical,” including how we understand, process, and communicate information. Conditions like autism spectrum disorder (ASD), ADHD, dyslexia, and other unique learning abilities fall under the neurodivergent umbrella. Each comes with its own challenges and strengths, so understanding and embracing neurodiversity is crucial, especially in parenting. 

After a year of struggling to find the best way to manage my time and workload, my therapist suggested I might explore the possibility that I had ADHD. A few weeks later, I was diagnosed at age 37. I felt immediately validated, and although I’m still learning how my brain works, I’ve had many “aha” moments that have shed light on my past experiences and helped me understand myself as a person and mother.

But my story is not unique. According to a study, the percentage of people newly diagnosed with ADHD between ages 23-29 and 30-49 nearly doubled from 2020 to 2022. And much of that increase, experts believe, is due to an increase in ADHD diagnoses in women. 

Parenting with ADHD can feel like a bumpy rollercoaster ride. Some days, everything goes great, and I feel like I should win the “best parent ever” award. On other days, I feel extremely overwhelmed and crave a sensory break, alone time, or a quick dopamine hit from a mindless scroll through social media. Self-care habits like prioritizing sleep, moving my body, and deep breathing when I remember are essential for me to recharge and be the best parent I can be.

My fast-paced brain helps me connect with my son’s thought process on a deeper level. Our shared quick-thinking nature means I can better understand why he thinks and acts as he does. My heightened self-awareness also helps me recognize and validate his big emotions (we’re learning to regulate those together). 

Therapy and medication have been valuable tools for managing my neurodivergent brain. I’ve found that laughing at myself helps me work through the ups and downs of motherhood. Open communication with my husband has also been super beneficial. We try to embrace the inevitable unpredictability of parenting and adjust our expectations when things don’t go as planned, although he’s much better at that than I am. 

There’s nothing wrong with being different. In fact, I think having a unique brain is more of a superpower. Neurodivergent parents, particularly those with ADHD, tend to thrive with routines and organization, which can be super beneficial for kids. When things don’t go as planned, we can model adaptability and resilience—although sometimes this is easier said than done. 

I’m glad that more people publicly embrace neurodiversity so others feel less alone. In a recent interview for Parents, actress Busy Philipps shared how her ADHD diagnosis makes her a better parent. If you’re also a parent with ADHD, I highly recommend checking out the book ADHD 2.0 and the ADHD Chatter podcast. A few other resources are Autism Speaks and The ARC.

Lastly, know that you’re not alone on the parenting journey. Let’s connect and build a supportive community of parents with unique brains. Are you in?

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