September is National Suicide Prevention Awareness Month, an excellent reminder to check in with your teens and tweens. How are they doing—emotionally? Talking about mental health can feel super awkward, especially if this is a new convo in your house. But it can literally save someone’s life and is entirely worth the effort.   

Suicide was the second leading cause of death among 10-14-year-olds and the third leading cause of death among 15-24-year-olds according to a 2021 CDC report. If your kiddo is doing okay, they might know someone who isn’t, so at least get them comfortable with talking about mental health and provide the language so they can help.

Here are five tips to help you make the discussion a little bit easier: 

Choose the right time and place

Whatever you do—don’t force it. Teenagers are busy, so don’t start a serious conversation while rushing to practice or when glued to their phones. Find a quiet moment when you’re both relaxed so you can talk openly without interruptions. Chat during a car ride, activity together, or before they go to bed. The goal is to create a safe space so they feel comfortable opening up. 

Ask open-ended questions

Teens can be quick to shut down and say everything’s “fine,” so avoid questions answered with a quick “yes” or “no.” Instead, try something like, “How have you been feeling lately?” or “How do you manage your stress?” If you notice some apprehensive vibes, let them know you’re ready to listen without judgment. Remember, your tone of voice matters, and keep an open mind. 

Listen and validate 

Put down your phone, make eye contact, and really listen to what your teen is saying. Resist the urge to interrupt, judge, or offer solutions. Sometimes, all they need is someone to really listen to them. Let them know their feelings are valid and you’re there no matter what. 

Share your own experiences 

If you struggle with your mental health, tell your kids about it in an age-appropriate way—no need to get into details. Just let them know it’s okay not to be okay. No one is happy and positive 100% of the time. Sharing your experiences can help them feel less alone.

Make your talks more conversational than confrontational, especially for kids who think you’re always on their case. Simply share about your day: what went well and what didn’t? While at it, model healthy ways to manage stress and anger. Remember, it’s our role to guide them and offer alternative perspectives without undermining their independence. 

Offer support and resources

Educate yourself about mental health. Know the warning signs and when to ask for help. Avoid giving your unsolicited opinions; instead, ask if they want to vent or if they want your advice.

Finally, don’t give up. Ensuring your teen can cope with stress and manage anger is as essential as completing that physical exam for sports. 

Bonus Tip: Get on their level. Reading books about emotions works well for younger kiddos, but you’ll probably get a big eye roll from your teenager. Instead, use a movie or TV show with mental health themes as a conversation starter. Or try sending memes!

Here are some resources for mental health and suicide:

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
Children’s Mental Health - Medline Plus
SAMHSA - How to Talk About Mental Health For Parents and Caregivers of Children
Suicide Prevention Resource Center - Adolescents

Are you having these conversations with your teenagers?

Email us or give us a shout on our socials. We’re all ears👂!  And if you enjoyed this article, sign up for our weekly newsletter below, with tips, tricks, and trends coming to your inbox every Sunday morning.